Troubles with a Wii Remote
by Hasenpfeffer
Summary: "Master," Fi said, "The batteries in your Wii remote are nearly depleted." Soon after hearing this, Link goes through one of the most terrifying experiences in his life. MAY BE CONTINUED.
1. The First Time

"Master," Fi said, "The batteries in your Wii remote are nearly depleted."

"Wii remote? What in the name of the goddesses is that?" Link asked, swinging his sword aimlessly at the tall grass he was running through in Faron woods. He was gathering rupees so he could buy a new pouch from Beedle's shop. Last time he had walked in hoping to get it, he had been twelve rupees short. When he didn't buy anything, Beedle rudely dumped him out of the flying house through a trapdoor in the floor. Having no wish for that to happen again, Link was making sure he had plenty of rupees this time.

"I do not know, Master. I merely had the sudden compulsion to notify you," Fi answered as Link continued to slice the surrounding grass to pieces, "Maybe we should head back to the sky. You have been cutting grass for over an hour. I believe that you have a ninety-nine percent chance of having enough rupees already and you should really return to your mission soon. It is urgent that we find-" She stopped mid-sentence as the world froze around Link, his limbs clamping up as well.

Fi was stuck with her arms- if you could call them arms- wide, though he could only see a corner of one of them. The grass, his hair, and his hat were all stuck slightly angled from a breeze that had been blowing at them. Around him, everything suddenly dimmed slightly, as if he was looking through some sort of blackish fog.

"Wha- the world's gone all dim- I can't move!" Link panicked. The only thing he was able to move was his mouth- though thankfully he could still breathe as well. He balanced precariously on one foot as he desperately tried to move his unresponsive limbs that were stuck in mid-swing.

"Fi…? Fi! Can you help? Do you know what's going on?! Is it Ghirahim?! Fi?!" The green-clad hero tried to turn his head to see if Fi could still talk too, but his muscles still refused to work. He couldn't blink, either. His eyes started to water.

"What is going on? Anyone?!" Link tried shifting his body weight to make himself pitch forward, but his single balanced foot remained firmly planted on the ground.

"Fi?" he tried again, desperately trying to blink. What if he was stuck there forever? _What was happening?!_

All of a sudden, the lighting turned to normal, and Link stumbled forward a few steps, blinking furiously and rubbing his eyes.

"-Zelda as soon as possible," Fi finished her sentence, "Master? Is something wrong?"

"What _was_ that?! Didn't you feel it?" Link asked, confused.

"Feel what, Master?" Fi asked.

"The world! It froze! And then it went all dim and stuff… I had no idea what was going on! Didn't you notice?" Link picked up his weapon from where it lay in the grass after he had dropped it to rub his eyes.

"…I did not. Master, are you alright?"

"Yeah… I'm fine, but it was really weird! I have no clue what happened… Hey, do you think it has anything to do with that 'Wii remote batteries being nearly depleted' stuff that you were talking about?" The confused hero sheathed his weapon.

"There is a fifty-five percent chance that is what it originated from. However, there are a number of things it could have been. The Imprisoned might have been trying to break the seal again, or Ghirahim trying to stop us in some new way, or-"

"I get the idea," Link interrupted, "I wonder what a 'batteries' is anyway, or a 'Wii remote'…"

"I have no idea, Master."


	2. The Second Time

"ROWAAAARGH!" the giant octopus roared, swinging its long tentacles at Link and breaking off part of the already ruined ship's deck.

"Master-" Fi started suddenly, trying to catch his attention.

"Not now, Fi! I'm busy!" Link gasped as he tried to focus on dodging the annoying tentacles of the giant one-eyed squid thing that was tearing apart the ship.

"Master, it is important," Fi persisted.

"_What_?" Link snapped, turning on her.

"Master, the batteries in your Wii remote are nearly depleted."

"_What?_ This agai- Agh!" The green hero, having been distracted, found himself flying through the air as one of the tentacles finally hit its target. Link sailed through the air, trying to catch his breath after the wind had been knocked out of him when all of a sudden he froze, suspended over nothing but air.

Everything around him dimmed, and Link didn't know what to do. He was completely unmovable again, and this time all he could see was open water, a bit of darkened, cloudy sky, and half of the torn deck. In the corner of his eye, he could just make out a few tentacles frozen mid-swing towards him. Great. He had no wish to get slammed into again. Unfortunately, it didn't look like he had a choice in the matter.

"Hello?" Link called, trying in vain to shift himself out of the way of the jelly-like arms. Why did he have to freeze here?

"Is anyone there? I can't move! Am I the only one who knows this is happening? Fi? Mister Monster?"

There was, of course, no response. Link wondered how long he would have to hang in midair. His body was twisted in a really odd position; sword arm above his head, right hand halfway twisted across his chest, and his legs splayed and angled like he was in-between swimming and running. Not to mention his tunic was twisted oddly and his hat was nearly off. Not wanting to lose it, he tried to move the green cap securely onto his head again, but to no avail. His arms still wouldn't budge. Neither would the rest of him.

Just then, the world returned to normal, and he dropped out of the sky.

"Waugh!" He gasped in surprise as his arms suddenly moved as well. He had been straining so hard that he smacked himself in the head. Rubbing the side of his face, he pulled his long hat back on snugly, and then the tentacles hit him. After worrying about his hat, he had forgotten all about that danger.

Link slammed hard into the deck, the wind knocked out of him once again.

"Master, are you all right?" Fi asked worriedly, hovering uselessly at his side.

Link checked his headwear and sighed in relief.

"I think s-" His reply was cut short as he rolled out of the way of more jelly arms, "Fi, did you notice it?"

"Notice what, Master?" the blue and purple guide asked, confused.

"The world froze again! Like it did that one time in the forest! How could you _not_ notice?"

"Perhaps you were imagining i-"

"I was not!" Link interrupted, slashing a tentacle before it hit him, and waving his free arm above his head in frustration, "The world froze!" He stabbed the monster's eye one last time and it roared, splashing and thrashing until it exploded into dust and rainwater. The sea was calm once more.

"Master, nobody but you has noticed it happening. This shows that there is a seventy percent chance that you were imagining it."

Link thought about it. Was he going crazy? Was it the Triforce's doing? What was going on with him? But still, it had happened twice… and it was so sudden… and both times it had been directly after hearing Fi say that the 'batteries' in his 'Wii remote' were nearly depleted.

"I'm telling you, it's those batteries! They must be what's causing this… thing to happen! …What are batteries, anyway?"

"I am not certain, but I believe it is the substance that powers the robots here in Lanayru," Fi answered, "If the battery, or 'power source' dies, then the robot ceases to work."

"But… does that mean that Hyrule itself is running on a battery, and that the world is stopping whenever that happens? How come I can still move? …well, kind of." Link wondered. It was rather a scary prospect.

"I do not believe that we will ever find the answer to that, Master. Unless we meet the goddess Hylia herself again, there is a ninety percent chance that this will remain a mystery."

"I guess you're right…"

Sighing, the hero continued on his quest, desperately hoping that he would never, ever hear that fateful phrase ever again.

**A/N Wow, guys, I am just blown away by the amount of feedback I'm getting from this! Over ten reviews in less than twenty-four hours? For me, that's unheard of! Thank you SO much for all those reviews!**

**If you really enjoyed this, you may be pleased to hear that I've been considering it, and have a very high chance of continuing this fanfiction, partially for my enjoyment, but also from all of you guys, who have wished for more! So, you might want to stick around and follow it.**

**Cheers!**


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